About finding love

Question: How do you know she/he is the one?

Answer: I have no idea.

This topic has been in my mind for several years now, and i still can't figure it out. It started when one of my high school friend wanted to get married at relatively young age (okay, some might say that 22/23 is not that young). I didn't understand that time. In my mind it was like: Are you sure? Aren't you supposed to do many more things before getting married? (that doesn't mean you can't do those things after you are married, but still, getting married puts some boundaries for you). I asked her that time: how do you know he is the right one? And she replied: you just know. 

Several years after that, i had an office mate. Let me explain to you her history first, she had a long- term boyfriend at that time (8 or 9 nine years with on and off), she was a lil bit playgirl, maybe because her long-term boyfriend never gave her any commitment or plan for the future whatsoever. 

Anyway, they broke up. I forgot the details, but several months after that, she was introduced to her older sister's friend and somehow they made their way as couple. Less than a year after that, seriously it's only 6 months maybe, i was invited to their wedding. And i was like: whoaaa,,how could you do this? I still don't understand why because i never really asked her, but i assume that after waiting long enough for a commitment that was never given by her old boyfriend, what's the point of putting anything on hold again while you already find a good man who wants to commit? That's just my assumption. And by the way, they look good for each other.

Later on, my friend told me a story about her professor who is gonna get married this August. I know some story about the professor, she is single, smart, independent, not ugly and has so many great experiences in her life. She met her high school friend one day at a mall and that man tried to reach her, and voila... they are getting married soon after a very short time being together. The question is still the same: how does she know it's time to get married and he is the right one? 

Being single and hearing all those kind of stories somehow drives me crazy. Okay, i am a hopeless romantic, i have told you before on another post i think. Although most of my days i try to be logical. I can not understand how someone can be so sure about a very important decision. It's not like you can just end it if your marriage doesn't work well or you find some bad stuffs about your partner along the way. Okay, some might say you can, but still i am a person who doesn't believe in divorce (at least right now).

You only get to know each other on a very short time, how do you know you can accept all good and bad sides in her/him? Now you feel you love him/her and being loved too, but how do you know that will endure? You only get 6 months more or less to be with that person before tying the knot. Everybody can fake so many things in 6 months. Why would you put yourself in a, let's call it restricted area slash marriage, while you are still so young? Why would you give yourself a huge responsibilities by being a wife and mother? I don't get it. This is my brain talking, this is (maybe) me being jealous.

Anyway, the other side of myself -the hopeless romantic- considers all of those as wonderful. Oh right, there was a moment when i felt like i was so ready giving up things if we could make it work (though it didn't work out well after all). There are times when i secretly hope i am gonna meet the one in an unexpected way. Oh, another side of me!

I maybe will not understand why people do what they do. Not now, but someday who knows i am gonna do the same thing. I am not judging anyone here, i believe all the decisions are made with careful thinking and they are happy with it. That's all that matters, you are happy with it. And when the time comes, i hope i can say this too : i just know it.

A hopeless romantic who acts like i am not

-Me-